Monday, 15 August 2016

BWW: Bachelor in Paradise S3:E4 Evan's Going For It!

Hi guys!

Nipple tweaks for ALL!

Welcome back for some more shifty shenanigans on Bachelor In Paradise, who thinks Evan has a snowball's chance in hell with Amanda? Anyone??

My recap for last epi is up here if you wanna get caught up: BiP S3:E3 Recap

198 comments:

  1. Oh, yay. A twin is gonna cry

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  2. Hahhahah I love Christian's entrance and that Evan is eating a banana

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    Replies
    1. I thought he was gonna deepthroat it

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    2. You know they edited that out

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  3. She is knowing Josh all right

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    Replies
    1. But not biblically, look how far apart they are physically?!

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  4. Amanda was too ready for that; hahahhaha

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  5. Awkward Dick Doctor. That is a name that sticks

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  6. Is he flexing as he eats pizza?

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  7. Why was there a piece of pizza missing??

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  8. A pizza with no topping is the best he's ever had?

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  9. Shuddup Josh, nobody cares about your stoopid pizza!

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  10. Aww and Amanda makes it Evan's fault

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  11. Was she rubbing cayenne into the corners of her eyes?

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  12. You deserve someone ELSE so great, not me, I dig dbags

    Says Amanda

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    Replies
    1. 7 years later... "It's not his fault. Sometimes I do things that make him mad."

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    2. Remember when you were 25 and you mistook immaturity for excitement?

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    3. He/she is so crazy and unpredictable. It's awesome!

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  13. Enjoy kissing pizza lips for the rest of the night

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  14. That was the most obvious brushoff ever and he took it as hope

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  15. Talking with a mouf full of pizza is so sexy

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  16. As Josh smacks away on his pizza while interviewing

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  17. Josh is lecturing on maturity?

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  18. Shaving backs... Daniel is LOVING that

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  19. Nick is cute but all his hair is pubey, huh?

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  20. Is constant kissing Josh's way of marking his cattle? I mean, woman.

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    Replies
    1. I don't know how she can take it

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  21. I hope Christian says SEXY 8 times

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  22. Moar kissing. Lock it down, boys

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  23. Oh great, Sarah is Daniel's best friend!

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  24. Daniel is nervous. What do you do with a girl??

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    Replies
    1. Close your eyes and pretend she has a penis, Danny

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    2. Slip into Greco-Roman wrestling gear and oil up?

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  25. Oh such a bad kiss from Daniel

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  26. NOT EVEN PRODUCERS CAN TELL YOU APART, FERGUSONS

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  27. Take your double rejection and try to leave with some dignity, Evan

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  28. Remember when you were 27 and faking a romance and you'd rather gossip about other couples than throw down with the woman you're with?

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  29. Cuz tattle tales always work out on this show

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  30. Don't pretend your intentions are honourable, Evan. You are trying to undermine Josh for personal gain.

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  31. I call producer shenanigans

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    Replies
    1. "Did you know his ex wrote a book? You should tell Amanda, she deserves to know, doncha think? Mention emotional abuse a lot!"

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  32. Everyone warns Amanda about Josh *Amanda wants Josh even more*

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    Replies
    1. He's misunderstood! I'm the only one who gets him!

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    2. "He'd never do that to ME!"

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  33. The gossip chain is rolling, woo woo!!

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  34. Evan got beat up by our other alpha male with anger management issues too, right? Maybe he needs the Greco-Roman gear

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    Replies
    1. The anger management issue guys tend to pick their targets carefully. Rarely do they tangle with someone bigger.

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    2. But Evan was hanging around Chad and going through his luggage and poking at him

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    3. Not saying that Evan isn't a weasly dick

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    4. Trying to look at it from a female perspective, if a woman kept following around abusive dudes: would I blame her and suggest she gets off onnit? Probably not

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  35. Because there was no reason to inject himself into all that

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  36. "A real and genuine connection." Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

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  37. Replies
    1. OUR CONNECTION IS IN GOD'S PLAN!

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  38. He keeps saying "I found out about this book."

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  39. How didja find out about it, Evan?? Since you haven't read it?

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  40. "You keep saying stuff like that." LOL

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  41. Replies
    1. To put it in hippie terms.... I get bad vibes from him.

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    2. Matt Lauer would call him glib

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  42. Josh is out douching Evan. Huh

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  43. Nick sliding in there, leaning on Josh's sweat-soaked pillow

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  44. Amanda doesn't want to talk about Andi's book any more

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  45. Andi posts these zen tweets after these episodes. It's awesome

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    Replies
    1. She's got her flippy floppys!

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    2. Josh is straight up making copies!

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  46. And Josh is the paragon of maturity. Also, how many times did he say connection?

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  47. Amanda trying to fake thinking

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  48. Please, Amanda. We ALL know what you're gonna do.

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  49. She sounds exactly like Reese Witherspoon

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  50. I don't think this is Carly's show either

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  51. They don't show the occupation for anyone else, but love Evan's title

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  52. Oh Evan. You just need to be true to yourself. And your boyfriend

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  53. SHE PICKED JOSH. WHAT A SURPRISE!

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  54. No way! Amanda still picked Josh!

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  55. They love the word "amazing"

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  56. Christian's just slightly creepy

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  57. Evan??? WTH, Carly. You spent the last half of the previous episode bad mouthing him

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    Replies
    1. She knows he'll pick her next go round

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    2. That is exactly what I was thinking

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    3. Carly going for the long game

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  58. I'm still all, Brendan WHO

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  59. What signals, Brandon. The same ones that encourage stalkers?

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  60. But which sister sent him home?

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  61. I'm still all, Brendan WHO

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  62. Josh loves saying "connection"

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  63. Josh doesn't know what Nick's issue is with him...

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  64. "I'm blond. Fake boobs. And put out with ease. I never get what I want."

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    Replies
    1. ...how does one put out WITHOUT ease?

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    2. Yeah. Sometimes when you rush a comment, it doesn't work out that well...

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  65. To think Caila was the Bachelorette for a hot minute until they fired her butt. Rude!

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    Replies
    1. For JoJo! She was supposedly too boring

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  66. Nick just said "Remember when ..." hahahahaha

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  67. She is only a little bit older than Megan. If she ever acted that vacuous...

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  68. Oh how the mighty have fallen.

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  69. Everyone working on their melanoma

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  70. What does condescending mean?

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  71. The women don't like her because the men like her. Lol

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  72. The blondes are on the offensive

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  73. She wet her wall down? What??!!??

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  74. She really does have good hair. LOL

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  75. Who is this old man trying to sell me blood thinners? Something to do with basketball. TTM? Little help?

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    Replies
    1. A Laker back when it meant something, lifer like Kobe Bryant

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  76. "Can I borrow you for a sec.." What? Why not say can I talk to you?

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  77. Sweet means dumb, right? It's the code?

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    Replies
    1. You're good at this! Like a Navajo code talker.

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  78. Caila was sweet, but snooze fest TBH

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  79. Awwwwww. Poor guy wants it both ways

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  80. At least Emily was cool about it

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  81. It's Pageant Queen vs Barbie Doll on BiP!

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  82. Did it look like he was gonna take a header off the horse just before they edit cut?

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  83. One of those bewbs is coming out

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  84. Just happened to find a coconut, straws, and drink parasols on a deserted beach.

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  85. Oh! Jared actually made a move!

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  86. Daniel just wants to play with the boys

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